Young adults is a phase in which they are facing superb pressures. Being on a transition from a teenager who living life at the fullest without thinking how to pay bills, into an adult who needs to live out life independently. Issues also happen along this phase. Suddenly we live in a world full of uneasiness and problems we have feels multiple times heavier. Fear, worry, doubt and what ifs. They consistently fulfil every corner inside my mind. Not dominating, but quite overwhelming for sure. Once I tried to make sure that I am not alone, but then I saw my friends posts on insta. All happiness they expose. Oh, what a fine life they are living. Do they feel puzzled as I do? Do they experience doubts as I do? Questions inside my mind are getting a lot more noisy as I compare myself to others. In this case, certainly it’s not only me. There are friends who are successfully build their business, friends who win prestigious competition, friends who get overseas scholarship or even friends who finally meet their true love and get married. It drives us wondering why can’t we live their life too. Why it seems so easy for them but very difficult for us to get there? I admit, this is a hard thing to deal with. It takes long long time for me to realize that it is all about mindset. Here’s a journey of me realizing the immateriality of comparing ourselves to others.
At the moment I feel awfully overwhelmed by other people’s achievement, I take a deep breath and try to figure it out. Why it overwhelms me ? If it is because I want to achieve that achievement too, then what makes me feel like I want that achievement? What is the worst thing if you don’t get the achievement? What is the impact to your life? Is it worth concerning? I usually ask myself bunch questions until I found that I have no reason to be worried because I am not the same as others. After this, I usually realize that I have no reason to be overwhelmed to other’s achievements.
Then, I also keep in mind that I have my own path in life. At the time when I feel insecure for my friend who is chosen as the speaker in reputable seminar, I tell my self that it is not a must for human to have such experience. I can be great in other fields. As an analogy, the whole theatre team cannot be the main character. There are the director, scriptwriter, stage manager, wardrobe team, and other crews. It might be very cool for being the main characters, yet the show can‘t go on without the people at the backstage.
The point is, it is not a mandatory for all of us to be the same as others. All humans walk in their own path leading to their own destinations. It’s okay to see others accomplishment as a motivation to do better, but don’t make it as a standards. There will be time for you to shine your own glow. Even flowers have different times to bloom, so do you.
